My "No Plan" Birth Plan

I'm discovering that some women have an idea of their birth plan even before they are pregnant.  I guess these women just know early on that they want to have a natural delivery (or whatever their plan might be).

I do not consider myself to be one of these women.

Please don't misunderstand me... I think it's GREAT that they have a plan for how they want things to go.  But as for me?  I felt very open to all options.

As I told my doctor, let's get one thing clear from the beginning: I don't need to be anyone's hero.  In other words, I would've signed off on an epidural at my first doctor's appointment if they would've let me.

I see no difference between women who have epidurals and women who have natural births.  I think it's AWESOME that some women are able to do it naturally!  Good for them!  And my intention was to be as prepared as possible IF that ended up being the case for me (you can never be too prepared in my opinion).  But are these women somehow stronger or better than other women who have epidurals or c-sections???

Personally, I don't think so.

My "No Plan" Birth Plan originally consisted of any/all options including but not limited to:
(please note that these are not ranked in any order)
1) Natural delivery.
2) Any/all drugs available.
3) C-section.
4)  Magic???  Somehow the baby just magically appears outside of me in a totally painfree way?

Like I said before, I am open to ALL options.

That is... until my doctor told me after my 20 week ultrasound that I would very likely have a c-section.  I immediately felt a little deflated.  The mom in me totally understood that a c-section would be the safest option for myself and my baby... but the therapist in me wanted my baby to come when he's ready.  My doctor explained that he would be slightly pre-term and I felt disappointed that my baby would miss out on those last weeks of development for the brain and lungs and liver. 

I had a complete placenta previa meaning that the placenta was covering my cervix and basically, there was no natural way out for the baby.  If it didn't move (and my doc did not think that it would), then I would need to have a c-section BEFORE going into labor (because contractions could cause the placenta to detach and I could hemorrhage and we could both die).  Because we live 7500 feet above sea level, this is considered a "high altitude" pregnancy and those babies MAY tend to come early so I was told the c-section would happen at 37 weeks.  I was also told that because of our altitude, combined with the previa, our baby COULD be slightly smaller than average because both things can complicate intrauterine growth. 

So, the benefit of having this slight complication is that I got to have more regular ultrasounds to check on the baby's growth and to check the location of the placenta.  With each ultrasound I was given good news... but with the warning that although the placenta HAD moved, it still hadn't moved quite enough.  On the other hand, the baby was growing steadily (in the 66th percentile I might add) so no concerns there. 

Finally, at my 32 week ultrasound I was told the placenta had moved completely and I was now a candidate for a vaginal delivery.  No more scheduled c-section talk... we were now waiting on baby to make his own debut into the world.  I felt relieved, but also terrified. 

Let's fast forward to yesterday... 12/28.  I went to the doc for a routine appointment.  I'm 37.5 weeks pregnant.  The day I hit 37 weeks was the day I went from feeling "really good" to feeling "so done with this pregnancy."  Not sure why other than some pregnancy symptoms started REALLY ramping up (swelling in my hands, carpal tunnel in both wrists, inability to sleep at night, difficulty putting on shoes, etc).  So, I head into my appointment just knowing that the doc is going to tell me I'm well on my way to having this baby soon. 

Nope. 

Basically I was told that my cervix was completely closed.  More or less nothing was happening yet other than baby appears to be head down.  I left the appointment, got in my car, and just started crying.  Once the tears started, I literally could not turn them off.  Then, I felt so ridiculous for crying about this (2.5 weeks before my actual due date), that I started crying HARDER!  These pregnancy hormones are no joke!

In between sobs I talked with Mike about it and he (ingeniously) pointed out that in a way I probably do feel "past due" because for months we talked about baby coming at 37 weeks.  Duh.  Why didn't I think of that?  I couldn't figure out why I felt SO "past due" and I was absolutely DREADING the possibility of being pregnant for another 2.5 weeks (or God FORBID even longer).  Suddenly my emotions made a little more sense to me (although I still primarily blame hormones because I can literally cry over ANYTHING right now). 

So, my current perspective is this: This baby will come when it is his time.  I have no control over that and I'm actually grateful for that fact.  The best things are worth waiting for.  This season of pregnancy too shall pass.  I already feel that I am going to miss these kicks and punches (yep, even the ones to the bladder) so I am going to relax and savor these moments as much as I possibly can.  I will focus on the fact that God's timing is ALWAYS accurate.  Always.  And just like a kid at Christmas, I will enjoy this time of anticipation while I continue to count my ridiculous blessings. 

Much love from Tahoe,
XOXO

So Very Thankful

We spent Thanksgiving in Tahoe this year.  Fortunately, Pam and Michael made the trek from Hawaii to spend the holiday with us!  It was so nice to have them here.  Holidays are hard when you're away from family.  It was a very traditional Thanksgiving... we watched the parade... we cooked all day... we ate way too much... we took naps and lounged on the couch.  The BEST part was that Mike was supposed to work all day but the mountain closed due to weather and he got to come home!!! 

We woke up Thanksgiving morning to a winter wonderland.  I wish Zephyr had been more excited for the first real snowfall but unfortunately he was feeling a bit under the weather after eating some bad treats.

SOMEONE HAS A TUMMY ACHE.  SO SAD. 

BEAUTIFUL MORNING

HE ATTEMPTED... BUT JUST COULDN'T GET EXCITED ABOUT THE
SNOW.  THAT'S HOW WE KNEW HE WASN'T FEELING WELL. 

THE NEXT STORM ROLLING IN. 

GOTTA STAY HYDRATED ON OUR WALK

IT WAS COLD AND WINDY. 

WHOLE GROUP SELFIE! 

32.5 WEEKS PREGNANT!

Thanksgiving day was wonderful!  The entire weekend was wonderful!  Friday (and Saturday) we ate leftovers.  No, we didn't do any Black Friday shopping.  But, we did get our Christmas tree put up.  And guess who was FINALLY feeling better: 

FINALLY BACK TO HIS OLD SELF. 

VIEW FROM MY WALK WITH AUNT PAM

ROLLING IN THE SNOW...
WITH A VIEW! 

SELFIES WITH AUNT PAM!!! 

Saturday was all about decorating for Christmas and Sunday was a day to relax (for me at least).  Zephyr LOVED having Pam and Michael around.  They spoiled him with love and attention (something he is obviously neglected of).  And Mike and I loved having them here too!  We really think it should be an annual tradition.  

It's always so hard to be away from family around the holidays.  I see all the pictures online and feel like we are missing out!  But, it's amazing to know that we have a loving family who supports us wherever we choose to live.  We really are blessed beyond what we deserve.  

And next year we will have another member of the family to celebrate with!  We are getting so excited to meet our new addition.  Here are some progress updates on the baby's room: 

I LOVE THE MOUNTAIN BOOKENDS. 

STILL GOTTA GET A CRIB. 

OUR ROCKER WAS A THRIFT STORE FIND. 

I HAVE A FEELING WE WILL BE USING THIS
AREA QUITE A BIT

CO-WORKERS AND FRIENDS HAVE GRACIOUSLY
GIVEN US LOTS OF HAND-ME-DOWN CLOTHES
AND SHOES.  I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THESE
LITTLE CONVERSE SNEAKERS!
AND HE CAN MATCH MOMMY CAUSE I TOTALLY
HAVE THEM TOO!  

We really are counting our blessings this year.  Maybe that's why I love Thanksgiving so much (besides all the yummy food).  It reminds me how blessed I am to have good health, good friends and family, shelter, food, a job, etc.  We may not have it ALL, but we all have a lot to be thankful for. 

With Thanksgiving love from Tahoe, 

XOXO

Showered With Love

Last weekend I flew home for a long weekend to visit family and for the SWEETEST baby shower ever!  I am still overwhelmed by the love and support from our friends and family who STILL support us despite the miles between us.  I can never express my gratitude for these people.  It takes a village to raise a child, right?  Well, we couldn't be luckier to have a village on both sides of the country!  How truly, truly blessed we are!

Anytime I can spend in NC with my family is a great time and this trip (although short) was no exception!  I flew in Thursday afternoon... it rained ALL day Friday while mom and I ran errands to get ready for the shower... I visited with family and got POURED (not showered) on at the baby shower Saturday, then left EARLY Sunday morning to head back to Tahoe.  Total whirlwind trip but so worth it to see all my favorite people.  That's the best part of any shower or party, is all your favorite people coming together in one place! 

My sweet sister-in-law and best friend took lots of pictures for me so that I could talk to people and enjoy seeing everyone!  Thank you again ladies!  I really appreciate it! 

MOM HAD A BEAUTIFUL SASH FOR ME TO WEAR
AND FLOWER PINS FOR ALL OF THE GRANDMOTHERS AND
GREAT GRANDMOTHERS

OVER THE TOP WITH THE DECORATIONS!
DAD MADE THE MOUNTAINS!!!  THANKS DAD!
I CAN NOT GET OVER HOW ADORABLE IT ALL WAS!!!! 
I'M SO GRATEFUL FOR THE TIME AND EFFORT PUT IN!

THE ADORABLE LITTLE MOUNTAIN GARLAND WILL HANG
IN BABY'S ROOM WITH ALL OF THE SWEET CARDS WE RECEIVED!

MY AWESOME MOTHER-IN-LAW BROUGHT
THE SWEETEST AND MOST DELICIOUS CAKE!
THANK YOU AGAIN!

YUM! 

MY SIS-IN-LAW AND NIECE MADE THESE
ADORABLE MOUNTAIN COOKIES!

EVEN THE NAPKINS WERE ADORABLE

LITTLE VOTIVE CANDLES FOR GUESTS TO TAKE
AND LIGHT WHEN BABY IS BORN WHILE SAYING
A PRAYER FOR THE BABY

MIKE'S GRANDMOTHER

MIKE'S GRANDMOTHER
(WHO MADE IT ALL THE WAY FROM NY!!!)
THANK YOU AGAIN FOR COMING! 
IT WAS SOOOO GREAT TO SEE YOU! 

SOME OF MY PEOPLE... MY GIRLS THAT I CAN ALWAYS
COUNT ON AND WHO HAVE BEEN BY MY SIDE DURING
SOME OF MY BIGGEST MOMENTS! 
LOVE YOU LADIES! 

CUTE ROCKER FOR OPENING GIFTS

I LOVE ALL OF OUR EXPRESSIONS IN THIS
PICTURE! 
WE WERE SO BLESSED WITH SO MUCH
ADORABLE STUFF FOR BABY!
THESE WERE RUBBER DENTURES FOR TEETHING
(THANKS AGAIN AUNT JENN JENN)

I LAUGHED UNTIL MY BELLY AND CHEEKS HURT!

MY MOTHER-IN-LAW MADE US A PLETHORA
OF HOMEMADE AWESOMENESS INCLUDING
THIS BEAUTIFUL QUILT!
IT IS SO PERFECT!!!! 

MY BEST FRIEND'S MOM MADE THIS AMAZING
STRING ART WHICH I CAN NOT WAIT TO HANG
ABOVE THE CRIB! 
IT IS TRULY AWESOME AND I COULDN'T
LOVE IT MORE! 

MY SWEET FIN AND LAINEY!  I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH! 

MY BROTHER AND I...
AND I DIDN'T GET A PICTURE WITH MY
SIS-IN-LAW WHICH IS A SHAME BECAUSE
SHE DID A LOT TO HELP AT THE SHOWER! 
SORRY ANAKAH! 

My sweet family and friends are the best!  We are so excited to meet our little guy and to bring him back to NC and show him off to everyone!  If I haven't said thank you enough, let me say it again... THANK YOU EVERYONE! 

I made it back to Tahoe in time for Halloween: 

And just like that, we are solidly in the third trimester of what feels like the fastest pregnancy EVER!  I can't believe how quickly it's going.  

Stay tuned for more updates in the next few weeks!  

Leaf Peeping on Tioga Pass

For the first time in a while, Mike and I had a day off together!  We agreed to sleep in and then figure out what we wanted to do for the day.  Over a leisurely breakfast and hot cup of coffee, he suggested taking a road trip down to Tioga Pass and Yosemite - just for the day.  The fall foliage is peaking down there now so we decided to go for it!  

We knew it would be a LONG day in the car so we loaded up the dog and some snacks and off we went.  

PERFECT, CLOUDY, COOL FALL DAY

FAMILY PHOTO 

25 WEEKS PREGNANT

I HATE THAT I'M BLOCKING MY FACE BUT IT WAS SUCH
A CUTE PIC OF ZEPHYR THAT I HAD TO INCLUDE IT. 

STOPPED FOR LUNCH AT WHOA NELLI DELI.
THE BEST FISH TACOS AND CARNITAS TACOS YOU WILL
EVER GET AT A GAS STATION! 
AND LUNCH HAD A VIEW OF MONO LAKE!

WE STOPPED TO PLAY IN TUOLUMNE MEADOWS. 
DOGGY SWAM IN THE FREEZING COLD WATER!

HE WAS SO HAPPY TO GET OUT OF THE TRUCK TO
STRETCH HIS LEGS A BIT. 

THE PICTURES REALLY DON'T DO THIS PLACE
JUSTICE.  IT'S BEAUTIFUL. 

THE BABY BUMP IN FRONT OF BRIDAL VEIL
FALLS IN YOSEMITE VALLEY

BRIDAL VEIL FALLS AND THE MERCED RIVER. 

EL CAPITAN

TREES GROW OUT OF THE ROCKS AROUND HERE

VIEW OF HALF DOME IN THE DISTANCE

A STORM IS MOVING IN. 

QUICK PICTURE BEFORE THE RAIN/SNOW.
LUCKILY WE HAD MADE A QUICK PIT STOP JUST BEFORE THIS
 AND HAD CUPS OF HOT COFFEE WAITING FOR US IN THE TRUCK. 

WE STOPPED AT A LITTLE UNMARKED PULL OUT ON OUR WAY
OUT OF THE PARK AND THIS WAS THE VIEW.
IT WAS BEAUTIFUL! 

WHAT A HANDSOME BOY!
ZEPHYR'S FIRST SNOW OF THE SEASON! 

SO REGAL. 

We stopped for a quick bite to eat in Minden on our way home at our favorite little deli... followed by a Blizzard from Dairy Queen (husband's suggestion but the baby couldn't deny it).  

We were home by 8:30 and in bed by 9:00 probably.  

It was a wonderful, scenic fall day as a family!