Snowy Memorial Day Weekend

Typical Tahoe in May... it snowed!  Ridiculous. 

Anyway, Saturday we took Clayton up to Heavenly.  It was his first time using his season pass (yep... he has a season pass at 4 months old) and first time riding the gondola. 

SELFIE ON THE GONDOLA

We met some friends on the mountain and Mike and I took turns skiing.  It was a super short day though because the mountain closed for lightning around 11 am.  But, we each got in 3-4 runs AND baby got to go up on the hill so it was still worth it.  Clayton was having too much fun and skipped his morning nap! 

CRAWL. WALK. SKI.
HANGING OUT ON THE FLOOR OF
TAMARACK LODGE. 

Saturday afternoon we headed to South Lake Brewery to help celebrate their 2 year anniversary with baby in tow.  There were TONS of kids and babies there.  He was definitely not the youngest!  We got to hang with friends and drink some yummy beer... and again... Clayton basically skipped a nap (unless you can count the 15 minute power nap in the car on the way over there). 

Clayton was SO tired Saturday night!  He slept until from 8pm until 7:15 the next morning (when mom woke him up so we could stay on schedule).  When I walked in to get him he looked so sweet and snuggly.  What I didn't realize when I took this picture was that he was actually lying in a pile of his own poop.  Awesome!  It could've been MUCH MUCH worse, but still.  Poor baby.  Luckily he hadn't been in it for very long - it was fresh.  Ah the adventures of parenting. 

YOU CAN'T SEE THE POOP BUT THAT'S
BECAUSE HE'S LAYING ON IT.  

OH MY GOODNESS I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. 

Sunday morning we woke up to snow.  Blah.  So, we spent the day around the house, napping and doing tummy time to make up from Saturday.  We made a pot of chili for dinner and did about a thousand loads of laundry.  Nothing too exciting but I love those simple days.  

Monday will be more of the same... just hanging out at home. 
I was able to get in another mountain bike ride after work one day last week... but the mom guilt was still present... and I still cried.  I'm working on it!!! And anyway, here are some adorable pics from the past week:

MY SWEET LITTLE THUMB SUCKER

WITH MY HAND IN MY POCKET

LAZY DAY

STARING CONTEST

CLAYTON CURRENTLY HATES NAPS IN THE CRIB.
WON'T DO IT!!!  WILL ONLY NAP IN THE SWING
FOR NOW.  HOPE IT'S JUST A PHASE.
(In case you can't tell, he's crying in the picture). 

SOMEONE IS HOLDING HIS OWN BOTTLE!!!  

PLAYING PEEK-A-BOO WITH DAD AFTER
A DIAPER CHANGE

MORE LAZY DAYS

Also this past week, we got our first giggles on video (see facebook)!!!  And tried a little bit of oatmeal cereal for the first time (thanks to advice from a pediatrician friend)!!!  

Happy Memorial Day weekend to everyone reading this!  Thank you to those who gave the ultimate sacrifice (and to their friends and family).  Please take a little time this weekend to think about the meaning of the holiday and to be grateful for our freedom. 

Mom Guilt

I really wish mom guilt was not a real thing, but it is totally real.  

This past week I was able to go on my first mountain bike ride in approximately 1 year.  I was nervous because I am so out of shape and I just knew my legs and lungs would burn horribly.  But, you gotta get out there and do it sometime.  Even though starting from scratch is no fun, I have to start somewhere if I'm going to get back out there and enjoy riding.  

After work I came home, fed the baby, then headed off to ride Tahoe Mountain (a relatively short ride but all the way on the other side of town).  The weather was perfect for riding.  It felt SO good to sweat!  SOOO good to get my heart rate up.  SOOO good to get muddy and enjoy some fresh mountain air.  The downhill reminded me that I do enjoy mountain biking.  I needed to do this for myself.  After the ride I had some endorphins flowing through my blood... I was feeling good!  It was ALL great until... 

... I called Mike to let him know I was on the way home and he mentioned he was starting bath time with Clayton.  BATH TIME!  Then comes bottle and next is BEDTIME!  Suddenly I realized that I had basically missed my baby's entire day!  And I cried.  Stupid hormones.  

But seriously, if I hadn't gone on the bike ride, I would've felt guilty for not taking care of myself... for always putting myself last.  But by being gone all day I felt guilty for not spending enough time with my baby that day!  There is no way to win!  

Luckily I made it home while Mike was still giving him a bottle.  Through my tears I asked if I could please finish giving him his bottle and put him to bed.  Of course Mike agreed and he went upstairs to start our dinner (he is seriously the best).  So, I ended the day with some sweet bottle time, reading, and snuggles with my baby - and he didn't seem to care that I was sweaty, smelly, and covered in dried mud.  

This really made me realize that mom's put a lot of pressure on themselves.  Pressure to be everywhere at once.  Pressure to be everything to everyone.  I genuinely wanted to be on that mountain and home with my baby at the same time.  What's a mom to do?  If anyone knows, please tell me!  

I've decided to forgive myself of this guilt (at least in this one instance).  I can only do so much.  I can't do it all. Taking care of myself is not selfish, it's necessary.  Life is ALL about balance. I'm not going to mountain bike everyday and never see my son but I also can't spend all day, everyday with him (it's really not good for either of us). Balance. 

I'm sure I will feel this mom guilt frequently but the best I can do is try to work through it each time.  

I didn't take many pictures this past week and the ones I did, I posted to facebook.  Check back next week for more pictures!  I will try to do better. 

   

Resume: MOM

It was one year ago, on Mother's day weekend that I first discovered I was pregnant.  A LOT has happened in that year.

I have a completely new respect and appreciation for mom's.  Mommin' ain't easy (and I have a good baby)!  This work is hard.  This work is constant.  But thankfully this work is so rewarding.  On my drive into work the other day I was thinking about all the positive ways being a mother has changed me.  I realized that motherhood is teaching me patience and resilience.  Leaving my baby to go to work everyday teaches me to trust in others.  It is teaching me to depend on God (I pray a lot more than I ever did before).  It is steadily teaching me what love is.  It's crazy how much I thought I loved my son on the day he was born... it's nothing compared to how much I love him today... which is nothing compared to how much I will love him tomorrow!  It grows infinitely each day and it just keeps growing.  It's crazy.  And awesome.

I realized that mother's should be able to list "MOM" on their resumes and employers should recognize that automatically means 1) hard worker, 2) kind/loving/caring/compassionate, 3) still works well despite little rest.  The list could go on.

I'm not saying Father's aren't also amazing... they'll get their day... and I'm already planning how I could possibly put into words how awesome my husband is... but this weekend is about the mom's.

To my mom: Thank you for your endless love and sacrifice over the years.  Thank you for being so selfless.  Thank you for the sleepless nights you once put in.  Thank you for the tears you wiped away and the kisses you showered on me.  Thank you for teaching me to be responsible and independent.  Thank you endlessly for giving me solid roots and great big wings (including my "sense of adventure").  Thank you for being the person I know will ALWAYS have my back.  Thank you for listening to me through the years.  Thank you for tolerating my sass with such patience and grace. Thank you for being an amazing role model.  Thank you for showing me unconditional love so I can now show that to my own son.

I had a wonderful Mother's Day!  My sweet husband made me a huge breakfast (pancakes, eggs, bacon, coffee) and we lounged most of the morning.  We went to church and met up with some friends at the beach!  Mike did all the laundry and cooking/cleaning ALL day.  All I had to do was play with baby!  I also got an awesome, comfy "mama bear" t shirt and some beautiful red roses.  But seriously, my boys are so good to me every single day.  I am truly blessed.

Well, here are some pictures from the past couple of weeks (mostly from our Mother's day time at the beach)...

MIKE HAS BEEN ABLE TO GET OUT FOR SOME BIKE RIDES!
WITH ZEPHYR OF COURSE! 

COOLING OFF AFTER A LONG RUN

MOTHER'S DAY MORNING...
I THINK HE'S SAYING, "TAKE ME TO MY MAMA"
AS HE PULLS DAD BY THE EAR

TOES IN THE FRIGID WATER!  

HE IS NOT A FAN... YET. 

POOR BABY.  COLD TOES!  

GREAT DAY AT THE BEACH!
BEAUTIFUL WEATHER! 

CHILLIN' IN THE SHADE

LEARNING HOW TO LOUNGE ON THE BEACH

"YOU EXPECT ME TO NAP HERE???" 

AWESOME DAY WATCHING A THUNDERSTORM ACROSS THE LAKE,
HANGING OUT WITH FRIENDS, ENJOYING SOME BEAUTIFUL
SUNSHINE AND COLD BEVERAGES.  

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL YOU MOTHERS! 

Finally Spring in Tahoe!

The weather is warming and the days are getting longer which makes this momma quite happy!  Since being back from NC, I'm back at work full time and Mike is home with the baby, enjoying his 8 weeks of paternity leave.  Here's the latest (in pictures of course):

MORE SNUGGLES WITH ZEPHYR

WE TRIED OUT THE BUMBO SEAT! 

WE'VE TAKEN WALKS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD. 

CLAYTON'S FIRST SEASON PASS!!!
NOPE - NOT SKIING YET.
THIS IS MAINLY SO HE CAN RIDE THE GONDOLA
THIS SUMMER... WE CAN GO VISIT DAD AT WORK
AND JUST GO SIGHTSEEING.  

WE DISCOVERED THAT A FEW MINUTES OF TV
CAN BE VERY HELPFUL WHEN YOU JUST
NEED A MINUTE TO GET SOMETHING DONE! 

WE OFTEN JUST CHILL/PLAY IN SIDE LYING NOW

AND WE ARE GETTING GOOD AT REACHING FOR
TOYS, GRABBING THINGS, AND BRINGING
THINGS TO OUR MOUTH! 

ZEPHYR HAS BEEN ON SOME MOUNTAIN
BIKE RIDES WITH DAD!!!! AND COMES HOME TIRED!!! 

MOM WENT ON HER FIRST RUN IN APPROXIMATELY A YEAR!
HER LUNGS BURNED AND SHE COULDN'T RUN FAR
BUT THE VIEW ON THE RUN WAS SPECTACULAR! 

NEVADA BEACH OPENED FOR THE SUMMER!!!  WOOHOO! 

WE STOPPED SWADDLING CLAYTON'S ARMS
AND HE STARTED MOVING ALL OVER THE
CRIB IN HIS SLEEP! 

HE FLIPPED A FULL 180 DEGREES! 

We also participated in a baby dedication class at church.  The dedication will actually happen on June 2nd.  Well, that's the latest from Tahoe!  We are hoping to get outside more now that the weather is warming up!  We are excited to take Clayton to all our favorite places around the lake!  Stay tuned!